Pan-political: Next Wave of the Gender Movement. 1 of 9 - Introduction
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The gender revolution is one of the most important changes that’s ever happened in human culture. Its core intentions, its core missions, are undeniably needed.
Now that we’re 70 years into it, in some areas the gender revolution continues to progress. However, in other areas progress has slowed or stalled. Worse, in some areas we’re going backwards. After 70 years, the finish line is nowhere in sight.
I believe it’s time we considered why our progress is faltering, and what needs to change to bring about the next wave of the movement. At the broadest level, I suggest that historically we’ve mostly focussed on articulating and dealing with the problems after they’ve happened – what we need to do now is shift our attention to what’s causing the problems in the first place. This is going to take us into some radical and sometimes uncomfortable new territory, but it will lead us more directly to the just world we seek.
Ep90: Dr Elliot Justin - wearables as health monitors, future of robots and AI
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Well this is a rollicking romp of a conversation, in three parts.
I’m chatting with Dr Elliot, from https://myfirmtech.com/. Links are in the shownotes. Dr Elliot Justin has a background in emergency medicine, more recently specialising in sex and technology.
We started by having a chat about his product lines, which might be of a slightly narrower range of interest compared to what we normally cover, and it’s a bit more commercially-oriented than the usual vibe we go for here.
Then, about 24 mins in, we move into what I found to be a really interesting conversation about the broader future of AI and sex toys, which ranges from flights of fancy through to downright depressing. And you know how much I love the stuff others think of as depressing.
Finally, the last third is the conversation you have after you’ve recorded what you think you’re going to use, but then it turns out to be at least as interesting as what you were meant to be talking about. So I’ve left it in.
When I was recording it, I was going to chop things around and put the future-focussed philosophical stuff first, because I thought that the initial product info would be too narrow-cast.
But listening back, I think there might actually be something there for everyone, so I’m just going to leave the whole thing unedited, including the bit at the end that’s not meant to exist.
So here’s a conversation about cock rings, clitoris monitoring devices, health and heart-care, the future of robots and AI, the end of the species, and the problems with taking on an algorithm for happiness and hand-jobs. Good luck with that.
One word of warning: Generally, I try to avoid letting through language that assumes that people of a given gender have any particular genital type, as way of making the content inclusive.
In some ways, today’s show is a fail on that front. At the same time, there is some information here about how these products are very useful from a trans perspective, and it’s spoken about appropriately.
So, in some ways, today’s show is a win.
I’m still here. I still love you.
Since we last spoke, a lot of extraordinary things happened, resulting in me stopping workshops kind of abruptly, and selling The Practice Lab.
I will probably say more about all of that in a future episode, but for now, perhaps as a down-payment on some of that, let’s listen back all the way to 2017, with Barbara Carrellas and Cyndi Darnell.
So I’ll probably do an episode about that.
And I’m planning on doing a whole bunch of episodes after that on where I think the gender movement needs to go. Quietly excited.
But in truth, I’m doing one step at a time at the moment, and I have no idea what’s next. It’s ace. You should maybe try it. Or not.
But if you’re wondering if I’m dropping the podcast… At least at this point in time, no. Our love would appear to be safe, to the extent that love can ever be considered safe.
Rog from Curious Creatures is joined by:
Barbara Carrellas – World renowned author, workshop therapist, coach, adviser and speaker. Barbara has written many books, including the revolutionary ‘Urban Tantra’ and ‘Ecstasy is Necessary’. Find her at www.barbaracarrellas.com.
Cyndi Darnell – Therapist, facilitator, author and speaker. Cyndi has been a committed leader within the field of sexuality for decades and offers powerful therapeutic assistance in all matters related to sexuality and relationships. Find her at www.cyndidarnell.com.
EP 87: Is your gender identity fixed or flexible? Is it innate, or the product of socialisation, including trauma? ...With Avgi Saketopoulou.
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Today, we’re chatting about gender, and how your identity is influenced by the events you experience in your life. The conversation is especially interested in how minority genders such as non-binary and trans identities are formed, and how there’s healthy and less than healthy ways that plays out.
My guest is Avgi Saketopoulou, who along with Ann Pellegrini, has recently written a book called “Gender without Identity”.
EP 88: The Death Cult Club, Lomi Lomi, and Integrated Oncology with Alice Peebles
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Today, we talking about the Death Cult Club, Lomi Lomi, and Integrated Oncology with Alice Peebles. It includes a couple of side-journeys around consent and trauma-informed practice, and touches on Alice’s and Rog’s personal Death Cult Club Goals.
Oh, and some tips on how you can start your own Death Cult Club!
EP 86 Re 39: When things go wrong, or not as planned
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Today, answering the question, of what to do when things go wrong – especially when you’re topping.
To answer it, I’m back with Seani Love, an award-winning sex-worker and workshop facilitator. The conversation comes across like you’ve walked in on a couple of kinky therapists having a chat, which is precisely what it is – a nuanced deep-dive into exactly what emotional safety looks like in practice, from a couple of folks that have made mistakes and learned from them.
EP 85: Lee Harrington on self-care. Also gender, relationships, community.
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Lee Harrington, who’s been on the show a couple of times previously, has recently written the book “Becoming Your Own Beloved”. It’s a wild investment in yourself, and a radical piece of activism against some modern dilemmas.
Lee and Rog talk self-care, gender, lateral violence in minority gender groups, and some good old life philosophy.
Reaction video to Jordan Peterson on birth control and promiscuous sex (minus video)
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Today, I’m doing a reaction video to a Jordan Peterson interview, except without the video. So I’m just having a reaction, I guess.
In the original interview, which I’ll link to in the shownotes, Jordan is speaking about sex, consent, and sex outside of marriage. On top of that, I want to add another couple of thoughts on things Jordan at the end.
Heads up, this is mostly just me disagreeing with Jordan, but not all of it. He raises some good points, and honestly, it’d be interesting to get his take on a few things without the intensity of the polarised social media landscape he exists in; so much of what he says is a polarised response to a polarised attack, and it can be hard to actually get a sense of a person with all that noise.
Today, we’re chatting with Joli about jealousy – how it’s an awesome thing waiting to happen, what to put in place to avoid unnecessary amounts of it, how it pairs with attachment styles, and how to talk about it. Also, a bunch of thoughts on starting poly, navigating poly, and some relationship ideas that are good for mono and poly styles.
Today, I’ve hand-selected a bonus episode for you.
It’s from the podcast ‘Come As You Are’, and it’s about your hardware – by which I mean, your genitals, junk, hoo-har, your funky fandangle, whatever it is you call it.
More specifically, it’s about how all of our genitals have things in common, and how we all get formed from the same stock. I love that stuff, how it breaks down a lot of the idea that we’re like completely separate and incomparable creatures, based on our genitals, with no experiences or problems in common.
The episode starts with a listener calling in to ask about their partner’s bent dick, but it quickly expands out to include other genital configurations in a nice and body-positive way.
Interview with Fiona Patten (Reason Party, formerly Sex Party)
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Today, I’m having a fast and exciting conversation with Fiona Patten, who leads the Australian Reason Party. We get into politics, sex, gender equality, and collaboration as an alternative to the adversarial political system. Oh, and we touch on assisted dying, drug legalisation, and a bunch of other stuff.
What stands out for me about this conversation is how *real* it is. That wouldn’t normally stand out, but it’s quite an impressive quality in a politician. I found it refreshing.
EP 78: Re-Ep Jessica Drake re porn, sex-work, sex-education
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I’ve been going on a lot lately about the way porn winds up being sex education if there’s no other sex education available, and how that’s sometimes a good thing and sometimes maybe not such a good thing.
So I thought it would be great to go back and listen to this episode from 2019 with Jessica Blake, who’s a porn performer wrestling with just that problem. Take it away, historical Rog and Jessica…
EP 77: Rog being interviewed by Choose Love Podcast
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Today, I’m being interviewed by Steve from the Choose Love Podcast. Since he was interviewing me, some of it’s about me and how I came to be doing what I do… Then from there, we launch into what’s going on for most people in the world of sex, how sex education is meeting our needs or just, like, totally failing, and what I’ve learned along the way.
I found it to be a really enjoyable chat, I hope you do too.
I would like to see if I can blow your mind, at least a little bit, regarding unsolicited dick-pics. Actually, what’s happening in this episode, is that you get to listen in on a conversation I had with two people, where I set about blowing their minds about dick-pics – about the phenomenal circumstances that lead to their existence, and the surprising array of things that are going to need to change to fix the problem.
Settle in for an entertaining and enlightening conversation.
Tess, who appears on today’s episode, is an Occupational Therapist with a speciality in sexuality. Find them at www.connectabletherapies.com.
Show Update (We’re Back!) and BONUS Episode: Hot Money
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I’ve got great news… this podcast is back, baby!
I’m looking forward to being back in your ears, starting with a cracker of a conversation in about a week.
In the meanwhile, I’m going to pop in a bonus episode from our friends over at Pushkin. It’s the first episode from a podcast of theirs called Hot Money, and it’s about the business machinations of what goes on in the porn industry. I find this interesting, because… Well, you’ve heard me complain from time to time about what happens when porn that’s designed as entertainment is mistaken for education. I’m not anti-porn, and nor is Hot Money, but there are some drawbacks to how things are playing out that we need to reckon with.
This episode totally explores the business side of what’s driving that confusion, and articulates why a decent chunk of the sector is driven by motivations that are a long way from being educational in their intention, or from wanting to make the world a better place.
Things are busy, as we come out of lockdown. This episode is an update about that.
In short, Curious Conversations About Sex is taking a break. We suggest just leaving us subscribed in your feed, and at some stage in the future, we hope to be in your ears again.
Today, we’re looking into Restorative Justice again; this is the second in a two-part series, and I hate to do this to you, but I need you to go back and listen to the previous episode, if you haven’t already. Seriously, a bunch of stuff in the following episode won’t make sense, and I’m worried about how some things might sound out of context. It’ll be worth it, because this is a really juicy topic.
Rog, from Curious Creatures www.curiouscreatures.biz, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
– Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore’s vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at www.projectrestore.nz.
– David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA. He’s been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at www.skidmore.edu/sociology/faculty/karp.php.
The two Melbourne (Australia) based Restorative Justice services are:
Today, we’re listening back to the first of two episodes from 2019, on Restorative Justice.
I’ve chosen these episodes to listen to again because I got a lot of positive feedback from other listeners about these episodes – to which I’d add that they’re two of my faves, too.
At the end, I’ll provide a bit of an update on some services that are available to those of you in Melbourne, Australia, where Curious Creatures are based.
Now let’s get to it…
Today, we’re talking about one of the only sources of hope, in an area most of us generally feel pretty hopeless about.
When sexual assault occurs, it often changes the lives of the people that are directly involved, and also those around them. It’s like a pivotal event, a moment in time, that patterns everything that comes afterwards, and the thing that’s so hopeless about it is that there seems to be so little in the way of anything resembling a positive outcome, for anyone.
Restorative Justice is a form of mediation where the fundamental idea is that the people that were involved in an incident, actually sit down and try and work out what justice might look like.
Rog, from Curious Creatures, has a revealing, intimate, and compelling conversation with:
– Fiona Landon, from Project Restore, in New Zealand. Project Restore’s vision is for a New Zealand that is free from violence, and they do this through providing world-class Restorative Justice services, tailored to the needs of sexual assault. They can be found at www.projectrestore.nz.
– David Karp is a professor with Skidmore University, USA. He’s been a researcher, coordinator, and practitioner of Restorative Justice services in the university campus context for 15 years. He can be found at www.skidmore.edu.
The two Melbourne (Australia) based Restorative Justice services are:
Tess and I created the workshop ‘Opening Up To Opening Up’, as a deep-dive into the world of non-monogamy. We’ve had a think about which bits might be interesting here on the podcast, and would like to share with you the chapters on mythbusting, agreements, and jealousy.
A lot of this stuff is relevant to all relationship styles, not just non-monogamous ones. And if you’re not poly, it’ll certainly give you a little more insight into what goes on in this world.
